so explain again why im purple
no
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
