It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Randomize
