I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
