i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
