i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Randomize
