yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
ugly people sure do ruin things
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Randomize
