kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
