My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
