Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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