I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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