He asked me if I "almost moaned"
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize