I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
