Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
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