I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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