Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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