I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
21 Disappointing Confessions From Teenage Fathers
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
19 Of The Most Epic “I Quit’ Stories Ever
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus