I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
