apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
