Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
