No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
