We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
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They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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