hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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