he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
