im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize