like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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