Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Randomize
