you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Randomize
