Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
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Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
you're hired as official boob wrangler
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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