In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
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