That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
