that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize