i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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