Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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