At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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