Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
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