Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
