Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
