the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
