Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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