i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
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