I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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