So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Randomize