She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
