do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I need to sanitize my soul.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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