God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
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