he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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