i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Randomize
