We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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