I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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