This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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