There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
